Eugene Vega

Name: Special Agent Eugene Clayton Vega
Concept: Crackpot FBI agent
Faction: Unusual Incidents Unit of the FBI
Physical Health: 7
Mental Health: 7
XP: 0


Desk Agent: 3 (Paperwork, writing reports, reading reports, longing for a field assignment, shooting paper silhouettes, making coffee, computer use, normal research)

Field Agent: 2 (Shooting non-paper targets, trailing suspects, planting bugs, impersonations, interrogation)

Conspiracy Theorist: 4 (Abnormal research, conspiracy trivia, tinfoil hat construction, seeing connections, alien biology, UFO identification, symbolism)

Former Hippie: 4 (Drug tolerance, acoustic guitar, philosophy, Jimi Hendrix trivia)



  • Standard-Issue Pistol — +1 to Field Agent


  • Stack of "Confrontation" Magazines — +1 to Conspiracy Theorist
  • Tamlin Fedora — Breathe anywhere
  • 1 Health Potion — Heal people!
  • 5 gp



  • Gullible: -1 on disbelieving anything or using deception.
  • Fell Through the Floor: Reminder for Bright


Eugene Clayton Vega was born in a small town in Mississippi in 1946, almost exactly 9 months after the end of WWII. His dad was a Marine, and wanted Eugene to join the corps right after high school; unfortunately, Eugene failed the physical (he had asthma and flat feet) and was immediately disowned. He managed to get a scholarship to Mississippi State, and enrolled as a Political Science student; he thought that any sort of government job might get him back into his dad's good graces. In his Junior year, he fell in with a bad crowd; he took drugs, listened to Rock and Roll, and did all sorts of other things his father wouldn't have approved of.

Despite all of the drugs (ALL of the drugs), Eugene managed to keep his GPA up and graduated in '68. He spent some time cruising around with his girlfriend in an old VW bus; she dumped him abut a year later, and took the bus, leaving him stranded in upstate New York just in time for Woodstock. While there, he took some bad acid and ended up with extreme paranoia. After this, Eugene realized that the whole hippie scene was an attempt by the secret world government to control the minds of a generation, and fled to Buffalo. He got a job with Confrontation, a counterculture magazine focusing on conspiracies, and settled down.

After a few years in Buffalo, Eugene became friends with Otis Ward, an FBI agent based in the Buffalo field office. Eugene cleverly realized that Otis was an agent of the Trilateral commission, trying to gain his confidence and prevent him from finding the truth. He decided that the only way to throw Otis off the scent was to join the FBI, and bring the conspiracy down from the inside. Eugene worked diligently as a desk agent for several years, and was transferred to the UIU when the agency realized that he was a nut job.

After another few years of desk work, Eugene was finally given a field assignment, just to shut him up. He was sent to a town in rural Tennessee, to investigate and cover up some supposed poltergeist activity (which Eugene knew was a secret test of Rosicrucian telekinesis helmets). Eugene tracked the activity to a small barn on the outskirts of town, and was sucked into a strange portal which immediately closed behind him. He awoke in a bed in the barracks, with a slight sunburn on his lower back and a taste of cheese in his mouth.

What does your character fear?
Eugene is terrified that he might be wrong, that there are no huge, world-spanning conspiracies. Because that would mean that his transfer to the UIU was actually a demotion, not, as he believes, a ploy by sympathetic Reptilian rebels to get him closer to the truth. He doesn't want his career to have been meaningless.

What are your character's goals?
Eugene wants to expose the conspiracies he knows are behind everything wrong with the world, from the Vietnam War to male pattern baldness. He truly believes in these conspiracies, and wants everyone else to share his beliefs.

If your character could be an animal, which one would it be?
Eugene would be a magnificent sasquatch, the noble cousins of humanity forced by the Masonic spy satellites into hiding in the densely forested regions of Vancouver and Washington. He would help his Sasquatch brethren rise up against the Illuminati who are holding them down, and reveal truth to the world.

What is your character's dearest wish?
Eugene's dearest wish is for the conspiracies to be real, and let him in as a member. While he may claim that he wants truth, all he wants is to be special.

Why is your character here?
The UIU sent Eugene on a fairly simple assignment (after a whole lot of begging), covering up some "poltergeist" activity in a small town in Tennessee. The poltergeist was actually the emissions from an inter-dimensional portal, and Eugene fell through it into the House.

If your character had a tattoo, or another one, what would it be?
Eugene would get a tattoo of the Masonic eye-in-a-pyramid, to help him better infiltrate that organization and its Illuminati masters.

If your character could have any superpower, what would it be?
Mind-reading, to root out the conspirators.

What is your character's greatest weakness?
Eugene's greatest weakness is his belief. He's much too single-minded in his pursuit of what he thinks is the truth, and has a hard time seeing any other possibilities other than world-spanning conspiracies.

What is your character's greatest strength?
His single-minded devotion to his beliefs is also Eugene's greatest strength. Sometimes it actually is a huge conspiracy, and other people are too blind to see it. That's when it's Eugene's time to shine.


  • Player: choobakka
  • Nature: Conspiracy Theorist
  • Demeanor: Conspiracy Theorist
  • Concept: Crackpot FBI Agent
  • Faction: Unusual Incidents Unit of the Federal Bureau of Investigation
  • Age: 35ish
  • Sex: Male
  • Willpower: 5
  • Physical Health: 7
  • Mental Health: 7


Physical: (Tertiary)

  • Strength: 1
  • Dexterity: 3
  • Stamina: 2

Social: (Secondary)

  • Charisma: 2
  • Manipulation: 3
  • Appearance: 3

Mental: (Primary)

  • Perception: 5
  • Intelligence: 3
  • Wits: 3


Talents: (Tertiary)

  • Alertness (Noticing Lurking Agents of the Conspiracy): 5
  • Athletics: 1
  • Brawl:
  • Dodge: 1
  • Empathy:
  • Expression:
  • Intimidation:
  • Leadership:
  • Streetwise:
  • Subterfuge:

Skills: (Secondary)

  • Animal Ken:
  • Crafts:
  • Technology: 3
  • Etiquette:
  • Firearms: 2
  • Melee: 1
  • Performance: 2
  • Repair:
  • Stealth:
  • Survival: 1

Knowledges: (Primary)

  • Computer:
  • Enigma (Conspiratorial Connections): 4
  • Investigation: 1
  • Law: 1
  • Linguistics:
  • Medicine:
  • Occult (Conspiracies, Cryptozoology): 5
  • Politics:
  • SCPs: 1
  • Science (Crackpot Pseudoscience): 4


  • Special Agent of the Unusual Incidents Unit of the Federal Bureau of Investigation (2 pt): -1 difficulty for Investigation and Politics
  • Devout Discordian (2 pt): +2 Willpower per session


  • Bad Liar (-1 pt): +1 to lying difficulty
  • Chronically Shy (-1 pt): +1 to interaction w/strangers, +2 w/ crowds
  • Mental Illness (-2 pt): He's not right in the head. Work out w/ Bright.




Total Freebie Points: 21 + 4 Hooks = 25

How I Spent My Freebie Points:

Perk: UIU Agent - 2
Hooks - +5
Specialties: Occult - 2
Raising Science to 4: 9 (base 1)
Specialties: Science - 1
Specialties: Enigma - 1
Raising Perception to 5 - 7
Specialties: Alertness - 1

4 left

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